24 October 2006, Tuesday, 1.34pm
Hello, anyone out there?
I was just realising how emotional I have been for the past weeks. Last evening, SY kept telling me to open up. So I am opening up this Saturday. Believe this or not, I am already getting cold feet at the sound of meeting people. My inferiority is getting into me somehow. Perhaps because of a failed relationship that lasted 4 years, which left a deep scar that I am still healing? Maybe I am? Maybe not? SY drilled me and gave hopes of being who I am and proudly assured me that I am looking charming as before, so it is believed that I have my market value still. *eewwweee* The only flaw I have now according to SY is I have bolted my doors. So when is the warrior axing the metal chain to the door to set me free? What happened to my courage which I used to have? I never had problems giving speech at school halls when I did my presentation in my past employment. Now, I cringe like a millipede when I have to meet new people. My skills of bulldozing and fibbing are deteriorating.
So this weekend is packed with activities. To help or not to help my brother in his shift? If I do, I may miss the chance of meeting new friends, if I don't, will I be deemed as a selfish idiot? I think I will just do my fame awards acting and proceed with my own activities since I have my happiness to find, which is more important for me now than anything else. Besides, I am not loaning car from Frances for Stanley anymore, so I don't have to be there, there. I will make plans with SY to meet new friends, and soak my feet into the ice cold H20. if I do not feel the fireworks this weekend, I shall head for the disco next week to make a comeback at the dance floor with Olivier and SY. You bet I will.... urm... maybe not ... haha... But really, I shall hit Olivier and SY's advice for now, ie, to open my arms to receive the word "love". Ok, I need cupid. Is he here yet? Cupid, shoot me with your arrows thru and thru. If I need to die now, I shall die in the name of love.
............ *peeping-thru-the-door-hole-and-unletching-the-door-chain* urh.....hello? anyone out there?........ *stepping-one-foot-out-of-the-threshold* hi... and you are? *smile*
Hari Raya Aidilfitri.
Hello, anyone out there?
I was just realising how emotional I have been for the past weeks. Last evening, SY kept telling me to open up. So I am opening up this Saturday. Believe this or not, I am already getting cold feet at the sound of meeting people. My inferiority is getting into me somehow. Perhaps because of a failed relationship that lasted 4 years, which left a deep scar that I am still healing? Maybe I am? Maybe not? SY drilled me and gave hopes of being who I am and proudly assured me that I am looking charming as before, so it is believed that I have my market value still. *eewwweee* The only flaw I have now according to SY is I have bolted my doors. So when is the warrior axing the metal chain to the door to set me free? What happened to my courage which I used to have? I never had problems giving speech at school halls when I did my presentation in my past employment. Now, I cringe like a millipede when I have to meet new people. My skills of bulldozing and fibbing are deteriorating.
So this weekend is packed with activities. To help or not to help my brother in his shift? If I do, I may miss the chance of meeting new friends, if I don't, will I be deemed as a selfish idiot? I think I will just do my fame awards acting and proceed with my own activities since I have my happiness to find, which is more important for me now than anything else. Besides, I am not loaning car from Frances for Stanley anymore, so I don't have to be there, there. I will make plans with SY to meet new friends, and soak my feet into the ice cold H20. if I do not feel the fireworks this weekend, I shall head for the disco next week to make a comeback at the dance floor with Olivier and SY. You bet I will.... urm... maybe not ... haha... But really, I shall hit Olivier and SY's advice for now, ie, to open my arms to receive the word "love". Ok, I need cupid. Is he here yet? Cupid, shoot me with your arrows thru and thru. If I need to die now, I shall die in the name of love.
............ *peeping-thru-the-door-hole-and-unletching-the-door-chain* urh.....hello? anyone out there?........ *stepping-one-foot-out-of-the-threshold* hi... and you are? *smile*
Hari Raya Aidilfitri.
posted by chilliseedz at Tuesday, October 24, 2006
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